Month: September 2008

I want a Jim Halpert…or do I?

Shortly after the conclusion of the season premiere of The Office I was hit with this thought, “I want a Jim Halpert in my life.” In this episode Jim proposed to Pam after roughly 4 years of him liking her. Their relationship is fun, flirty, sarcastic, and ultimately romantic. It took time, and there were obstacles in the way, but they finally got engaged.

Directly after I thought, “I want a Jim Halpert in my life.” I thought “But you don’t want a husband.” If you know me you know that I feel that singleness is my biggest blessing and my biggest curse in my life. I feel that one of the biggest points of confusion in my life is how often I go back and forth between desiring after a relationship and believing that I am not going to be in one (or am not called by God to be in one).

I guess it makes me question whether or not I am actually content in my walk with the Lord, or if I am just being wishy washy in my thoughts, and convictions. After pondering here, while typing and talking to Hannah about it, I have come to this. I don’t believe that either statement I made is false. (That reminds me of Dwight). I believe that both of them are authentically me. I do wish to be in a relationship (or engaged) I also don’t want a husband (ie: to be married). Keep in mind that I don’t plan to date just to date but to date for the purpose of marriage. With all this in mind I do want to date or be engaged and I don’t want it at the same time, it’s confusing but I am okay with that.

I do believe that someday the Lord may potentially bless me with a marriage. However, I don’t feel like that time is right now, but that doesn’t stop the nagging feeling that I would like to be “liked” or engaged, but I am content with knowing that it may not happen right now, or that it may not happen at all. God is my ultimate authority and though I don’t believe He has said no to marriage, it is not happening right now this minute in my life.

So, I do want a Jim Halpert in my life, and I don’t want to be married right now, and I am okay with both of those thoughts being in my head at the same time. I am still content. God is still in charge.

June 29-July 4th–UTAH!!!

In my summer of travels, this was the first plane trip. It was great to be able to take one of my favorite people, Hannah, on this trip. I loved that we finally got to travel together. We have wanted to do one of these promotional trips together for as long as we have known each other. (We did travel to Ecuador together, but that didn’t count, I don’t know why).

We got to Utah, found our rental car, and headed on our way. (We had a sweet white pontiac grand am). We found the hotel and went exploring to find the main office. Now, that was much more difficult than it seemed. We couldn’t find the right door to enter into, and then the convention center was so huge we were walking in circles. It is after lunch time at this point, and we are hungry, but we find the room and check in.

We decide to do lunch at this point and wander over to the Olive Garden. We had a delightful lunch and then went back to the hotel for a little bit of rest before the evening session with Francis.

We got to the session and found Timmy, Hannah’s boyfriend’s brother, and were able to sit with his youth group. I was surprised by how organized the conference was, all the groups had assigned seating with the exact amount of seats assigned to them in certain areas of the convention hall.

The convention was great, it was so good hearing Francis speak, and we even went to a couple of other sessions which were equally good. I love how God uses each of these conferences in my life. I am overwhelmed and blessed that I get to attend these conferences.

The time at the booth was great. We were next to the other EBC…Emmaus Bible College. It was so fun to hear what they are doing and to get to know Israel and Reagan. We all decided that everyone should come to EBC. (We just didn’t say which EBC we were talking about). As far as my EBC is concerned, it was a great conference. We loved being ther and had a great response far surpassing what I thought it would be.

Hannah and I also got to see some great sights in Salt Lake City and the surrounding areas. A highlight was going to the Mormon Temple to get a tour and to understand more about mormonism. It was so interesting and informative. We both agreed it was one of the best things that we did when we were in Utah.

The last day, Hannah and I drove up into the mountains to a place that was recommended to us. It was called Ruby’s Diner, and it had the best breakfast ever!! We got to sit outside on a beautiful patio and eat a delicious meal, then we drove to Park City to go to the Olympic Park. We got to see people training for the winter olympics. They would go down these big jumps in snow skis do flips in the air, and then land in a giant pool. It was awesome. We also decided to go on a 1/4 mile luge, called the Quicksilver Alpine Slide. It was a really fun ride! We left there and went into the heart of Park City for awhile, and then left to get back to the airport and fly back to California. It was a great trip!

The Best Single Girl’s Dinner Ever!

So tonight I decided to go to the grocery store to grab some dinner. I didn’t quite know what I wanted but decided to get pizza and some ice cream. I sat down to eat and realized that I was eating Ben and Jerry’s, Pizza, and Diet Coke. Isn’t this the epitome of a single girl’s dinner?
All of it was diet of course: diet coke, lean cuisine pizza, and lowfat frozen yogurt. It was a great dinner, that I loved, but couldn’t help laughing about.

June 23-26, 2008–Biola and Momentum West

I headed down to Southern California (more southern than where I am now) with Nadia, an EBC student, for a conference that Francis was doing in Bellflower. The housing was at Biola University, my Alma mater, and I was excited to go there and see some old friends.

Nadia had gotten engaged two days prior to this trip, so her mind was on her beloved Steve. It was fun to see her excitement, count the diamonds in her ring, and hear all about Steve. It was really cute to see her so excited about her engagement, and the thing that I really loved about the situation was that she was completely content just to be engaged. She didn’t know the wedding date, and at that time didn’t really care, she just was enjoying being engaged to Steve. I was so encouraged by her.

If you know me you know that contentment is one of my hobby horses that I talk about all the time. I just feel that it is so important to be content right where God has you NOW versus where you are going to be at any time in the future. God is calling us to be completely content in Him alone in every stage of our lives, and each of us need to be striving towards contentment to better glorify God with where HE has us. Nadia was a great example of what I am talking about. She was completely content with where she was and a great example of being content where you are not where you are going to be. It was fun to see her joy in true contentment with where God had her.

So we got to Biola and checked in. It was really fun to be able to move my stuff into Stewart, a dorm that I had never lived in. I ran into Randy, an electrician on campus who recognized me and greeted me by name (I graduated five years ago). It was great to see him and hear about his family. He would come up to Thousand Pines and serve up there, so I had a couple of connections with him. We got our stuff in the dorms and headed to Bellflower. We got checked in and started to assemble the EBC booth.

The conference is one that I went to last year, so I got to see some familiar faces: Dana, TK, Dave, and Ed Lewis were all there. It was great to see them all and reconnect knowing that I would see them in a month or two at the Momentum East Conference. This conference had fewer students attend and there were only about 300 students there total, about 100 of them being from Operation Barnabus (the youth service team from Momentum).

The conference started and was really great. Worship was led by Todd Proctor and Francis spoke the first night and the next morning. I feel so blessed to be able to hear him teach in so many different places. It is neat to see his ministry all over the country. I feel so blessed.

I got the opportunity to meet a lot of the Operation Barnabus leaders (college leaders for the high school service groups). It was so fun for Nadia and I to meet each of them and to have lunch on day two with Sarah and Stacie.

One of my favorite memories from this trip comes from one of the Operation Barnabus students. Dominque came up to me and was asking about EBC, she ended up finding out my age and about my singleness. She decided that because I was of a certain age and single, I would be perfect for her youth leader. She brought him over later and was not sly at all in her approach. It was pretty funny. I had never been set up by someone who wasn’t one of my kids.

I also loved meeting and hearing Mike Yankowski share his story of living homeless for five months in five different cities. It gave me a heart for homeless that I haven’t had before and I am still figuring out exactly how I can get involved. He wrote a book, Under the Overpass, and I would recommend it to anyone. It is amazing.

I know this is so long, but I did want to share about my time at Biola. I got to “go visiting” with Nadia to all of my old hangouts. I got to run into Mark Hooper, who I haven’t seen in awhile and talk to him a bit, and then go to Student Services where I got to reconnect with Nancy, Carolyn, and Beth. I was bummed to miss John, Roxanne, and Ruth, but glad that I got to see the rest of them. I loved talking with them and catching up. It made me feel real special to be remembered after all these years. I definitely miss them and it honestly felt nice to have them remember me. After leaving that office I cried for a bit just missing what once was. We went to Feinberg after that to visit the professors, they were all on vacation, but Val was there and it was really nice to catch up with her.

We left Biola and came back home…Utah is next….

My Bible Study

One of my greatest joys during Spring Semester of last year was my Bible Study that I got to teach to a group of amazing girls, we first went through Hosea and then went through Idols of the Heart. These girls are so fun and we had a great time learning together.
From Left: Kelsey, Rachel, Scarlett, Leah, Ashley, Me, Heather